Why Grey’s Anatomy Is Great Despite All the Sex
Why is it always about the sex? People put too much stock in sex. They have an unhealthy relationship with sex. When a character on Sex and the City can get out of bed, have a spat with the woman lying next to him, and immediately conclude that “maybe I should just leave”… In what universe is that a response to someone you just made love to?
If Grey’s Anatomy is known for one thing, it’s the sex. You’d think that would make it an extremely boring show. Because sex is boring. Despite all the sex, Grey’s Anatomy is actually worth watching.
This is not about pop-culture morals (although it could be). This is about the nature of relationships. Love is not about sex. Love is about companionship, caring, and commitment. But here’s the clincher: What kind of a person would go to bed with someone she didn’t love? And I mean love in the “commitment” sense of the word. I don’t mean just the feelings and the passion. (Although they’re really cool, too.) I mean, what kind of a person would bring sex into a relationship that could end with a simple morning-after spat? That’s unhealthy.
Yet which of our favorite characters has not had an unhealthy relationship with sex? This is the irony. As human beings, what motivates us is love, not sex. Sex is boring. But what keeps us spellbound are the character’s problems. Healthy characters are boring. Disturbed characters are interesting. So when a character has an unhealthy relationship with sex, it’s the relationship part that motivates us, and the unhealthy part that keeps us glued to the TV set.
How can Grey’s Anatomy be such a good show even with all the sex?
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It’s not just about the sex. It’s about the characters’ relationships and reactions. For example, in the first episode we meet the main characters’ resident surgeon, Miranda Bailey, nicknamed “The Nazi.” Their relationship with her is a key part of the show. But their relationships include their feelings about and reactions to sex with each other. So while it’s not just about the sex, sex is an element that in the lives of these characters makes the story happen.
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Even the sexy characters are sympathetic. Izzy Stevens is played by the supremely sexy Katherine Heigl. In one episode, she says of Denny Duquette that he treats her as more than a supermodel. He treats her as he would an intelligent person. That was the one quality this man, 15 years her senior, whose condition had confined him to a hospital bed— That was the one quality he had that made her fall in love with him. They never had sex. Yet it has been one of the most meaningful relationships in the series, and certainly one of the most significant. All because sex goddess Izzy Stevens is a sympathetic character.
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